The Comparison Trap
Have you ever noticed how the holiday season amplifies our tendency to compare ourselves to others? Those gatherings and social media posts can turn into a mental scorecard of where we think we should be versus where we are.
Research from the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin reveals that when we compare ourselves to those we perceive as more successful (“upward social comparison”), it significantly impacts our self-esteem and can even lead to depressive symptoms.
The Comparison Spiral
Maybe it’s seeing a cousin’s new promotion while you’re still figuring out your career. Or perhaps it’s scrolling through curated holiday photos while dealing with personal challenges. These moments trigger the “comparison spiral” — judging others to feel better or diminishing our own worth. This is especially true when we feel we can’t “catch up” or meet perceived expectations.
Your Unique Journey
Here’s the truth: we’re all on different paths, walking our own unique journeys. Life isn’t a synchronized race. Your chapter five might be someone else’s chapter ten — and that’s perfectly okay.
When you find yourself slipping into comparison mode, pause and ask: What’s really going on here? Often, feelings of inadequacy aren’t actually about others — they’re about our own unmet expectations.
Use Comparisons as a Growth Tool
The holiday season presents a unique opportunity. Instead of using it to measure yourself against others, use it as a catalyst for self-reflection and growth. Each time you compare, treat it as a gentle nudge pointing toward areas that need healing or growth.
Quick Tool: Practice Gratitude and Reframe
When you notice comparison creeping in, pause and write down three things you’re genuinely grateful for in your own journey. Then, reframe the comparison by recognizing one positive quality in yourself that aligns with what you admire in others.
An Invitation to Transform
If you find yourself caught in the comparison trap this holiday season, don’t judge yourself for it. Instead, use it as a launching pad for transformation. Take these feelings as an invitation to embark on self-discovery and growth.
In a short 12-weeks, you can learn practical tools to move beyond comparison and step into your true potential. Imagine spending three months focusing not on others, but on becoming the best version of yourself — in alignment with your own values and aspirations.
Ready to transform those comparison triggers into growth opportunities? Your 12-week journey to self-discovery awaits. Reply with ‘I’m in’ to learn more and join the class.
When you focus on becoming the best version of yourself, comparisons fall away, replaced by a genuine appreciation for your journey and others’.
After all, life isn’t about measuring up — it’s about rising up to your own potential.
