Johari’s Window of Invincibility

The Pain of Losing my Hair

Johari’s Window

The window is divided into four panes regarding what is known by you and others about you. It brings to light the awareness of parts of you that are unknown to others and to yourself. You have an Open Self whose actions, behaviors, and information are public to others. Your Blind pane refers to the blind spot you have about who you are, it gives insight into how the perception of you by others it’s unknown to you. The Hidden self, also called façade retains the information that you hold private. It may be feelings, opinions, ambitions, dreams, and fears that you tightly guard against others. And the Unknown includes information that up until now, you and others do know about you, including subconscious beliefs, paradigms, undiscovered talents, or childhood memories.

Uncovering a Paradigm

In my case, becoming bald on the surface was uncovering the hidden self. I could no longer hide cancer because it was obvious when they would see me. It then became an open pane about having cancer. I had no shame with having the disease, but it did require me to become vulnerable in the process, something that up until then I had not experienced. I was no longer invincible.

The process uncovered my feeling of deep loss, discomfort, sadness, fear, and disbelief that occurred when I would see myself in the mirror. A paradigm was revealed which up until then I had not detected, perhaps it had lived in my blind spot and others knew about it, or maybe it was unknown to all. The paradigm that I could overcome anything!

Life lessons

Up until then, my life had been generous opportunities for learning. I had met the challenges and prevailed. As a child, I came from another country, learned the language in six months, and excelled in school and my career. I experienced a divorce that left me emotionally wounded. I had raised two fantastic kids into adulthood as a single mom. In my career and finances, I had reinvented myself and overcame financial troubles. Each time I had fallen and then gotten up and succeeded! And each of those times, there was no doubt in my mind, that I would triumph.

I am not Invincible

This time was different. I was not sure how triumphant I would be. I was vulnerable to a disease that could take my life. My paradigm of invincibility was out for the first time. I could lose this battle, the fear of the unknown felt like a black hole full of darkness and despair. Bringing light into the darkness was my purpose from that day forward.

Learning how to navigate an illness, befriending fear as I met the daily trials of the journey. This was my greatest challenge; not only because of the mental rigor that it took to rise daily in a way that is not natural but also because of the gift it brought me.

Side Note about Paradigms . . .

Paradigms are beliefs you have about yourself because of the way you were raised, lived your life, or the many experiences that are in your subconscious mind. The paradigms do not have to be real or make sense to our logical minds. For instance, you may believe that all rich people are crooked. Logically that does not make sense, but it is a belief that your subconscious mind has, and you tend to unconsciously judge people with money.

Why does that matter to you? It matters because it can potentially stop you from becoming successful. You will sabotage yourself when you are close to a breakthrough or success that will bring you a fortune.

Paradigms are sneaky, they keep us from moving forward in our lives unless you work to uncover them and overcome them. Since I thought I was invincible, I could have easily gone down the path of fighting against the disease, thinking I could do it alone. Uncovering allowed me to release resistance, and seek help from a nutritionist and life coach that had experience with helping people while in medical treatments.

Daily Practices for best results

It takes rigor and will to practice daily to look beyond the circumstance. That despite how things appear in front of you (having a bald moon face, feeling fatigued, moody, and with digestive issues, to name a few of the symptoms) life is a gift to be savored by setting an intention and attention on only seeing the good in your life. It is called a practice because each day produces a different curriculum. It is something that you do not master.

The practice brought me the most valuable gift by learning about how to reach a level of gratitude that has a life of its own. The gift of working with thought energy to produce the results you seek. And most important it revealed a deeper connection with Spirit by developing my intuition. And yet the biggest gift of all is the burning desire that was birthed in the knowing that I can help others overcome their darkest moments.

Johari’s window is an incredible resource to use to better understand your human journey. Each quadrant has a piece of yourself for you to learn more about who you are, why you are here, and how you can grow.